Facebook
Facebook (stylized FA1C3B00K) is a social networking site which launched on the internetz in February 2004. From which that date, Facebook has operated and owned your life, as you waste it liking shitty, boring statusus from some dickhead, a person who you have probably never even met. Since January 2011[update], Facebook has gained more than 900,000,000,000,000 trillion-bagillion killion active users (Which everybody knows there are millions of fools joining, and really, nobody gives a shit). Facebook users have the opportunity to create a personal profile, and add strangers as friends, who are most possibly 66 year olds craving and awaiting more 12 year old girls to begin posting pictures of themselves doing the duckface expression in a low revealing tight tank top wearing fake spray tan. Users can also send messages, including fucking annoying notifications which alert you when some old boring iritating cunt has sent you a shitty plant related gift in Farmville and of course when people update their profile every mili-second of every second of every hour of every 24 hours. Additionally, users might as well hang themselves in pure shame, and the fact they think they are not popular anymore (Which they never were in the first damn fucking place) and when they find out nobody has liked/commented on their status/pictures. Some users are so sick twisted, and most likely deal with mental illness/retardation issues, they find the pleasure in closing down their Facebook accounts and then creating another Facebook account, posing as one of their friends of that closed account and then sending a message to one of their friends from the account they closed, and then saying "Shame that guy closed down his Facebook profile, did you like that person, because i think that person should come back". These people are referred to as attention seekers otherwise known as Trolls. Also if you happen to be sad,depressed,lonely and completely jobless you may find interest in joining millions of tacky user groups or like pages. Then getting your account suspended by Facebook for doing something apparently wrong, which is mostly for no reason at all, you will relive the pure fun and enjoyment by creating your profile all over again from scratch, and then adding all of your zero friends all over again! The messages of Facebook should always HAVE and MUST end with either "xxxxxxx" and at the end of every sentance the last word MUST end with at least seven or possibly eight or maybe nine or MOAR of the same letters for example "justin bieber baby♥♥ he's so fittttttttttttttttttttttt". Other random shit that goes on, as constantly reminding their shit friends about who they now love "i ♥ u bruno marssssss" mostly coming from immature 13 year olds which are trying to fit in with their lesbian friends by putting their relationship status as married to a new little fugly girl from their poorly run school. Boys however are the same, except they '''MUST '''upload at least 20-30 topless photos showing their abbs daily, and then leaves another male feeling jealous and seconds after coming out of the closet, crying and fapping to some guy's topless photos, wishing you were fucking him, but now you can thank to Facebook, except your at home, not with the guy, fapping alone sulking in your shit stained underwear. Rules 'n' Shit, only yo momma cares about! To begin wasting your time and going on to commiting suicide attempts because people start telling you your useless and you should die or just simply killing yourself 4 tha lulz (Which is 99.0009.009% true for even thinking of joining), you must be over 13 years of age to join Facebook, but who cares, since probably Gwyneth Paltrow's toddler has an account on Facebook, keeping up to date with tha lulz on faycebo0kk. Facebook was founded by Michael Cera Jesse Eisenberg with his college butt-faggot roommates and some nerd rocket science students (Which nobody cares about). Although if you actually care, which makes you pathetyic, you should pick up a copy of The Social Network on DVD and experience the terror in 3D of the true Facebook experience. Although, i wouldn't, because it's shit.